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I have a 2 year old son who has a step grandfather. He has had the role of a grandfather to my son since the day he was born. Recently, my husband (and this is his stepfather his real father is deceased) and the step grandfather had a huge blow-up. We wanted to make up and talk immediately but we were shocked that he was "done with us".The step grandfather has decided to drop all of us including his beloved grandchild and missed the birth of his 2nd so called grandchild. The biological grandmother accepts his decision and has moved forward, but we are hurt most because our children have been abandoned by him.My question is, is it wrong to think that because he had a grandfather role and he assumed it that he should if at all try to resolve the issues with the stepson for the sake of the grandchildren? Is that too much to expect? How is he accountable? What are his responsibilities?

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A

Stepfamily relationships are often difficult. It would be good if the step grandfather was committed to the relationship with your child, however there is no legal obligation to do so. Unless he decides to reconnect there is not much that you can do.  You might consider finding some other person to fill this role, even if there is no official grandparent relationship.

Posted on 21 Jan 2009

Linda Skogrand
Family Relations/Diversity Specialist

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